Women for Women, International

There was a controversial bathroom at Georgetown when I was there. The walls of the girls bathroom on the 2nd floor of White Gravenor were a testimonial to the men to avoid at Georgetown. It ran from the mundane remarks about physical endowments and the like to serious warnings about physical and emotional violence – stay away from so-and-so. People’s opinions on the bathroom ranged from thinking it was a horrible violation of privacy to believing that it was a necessary early warning system for sexual predators.

I was reminded of the bathroom tonight as I was walking Yovo. A woman came up to me and said, “Hey, that guy you were talking to last night? He’s no good. Stay away from him. I live next door to him.” She didn’t go into specifics, but I suspect she wasn’t saying that he had loud parties or was un-neighborly. The guy in question had given me the creeps, quite frankly. I tried to avoid letting on exactly where I lived, and refused to give him my phone number. But he was one of those persistent creeps, who somehow makes you feel like you’re at fault for being creeped out by them. I have been here long enough that my instinct when a man starts talking to me is to brush them off, but every once in a while I feel bad, like I’m closing myself off to friends or conversations. So every once in awhile I actually listen to what creepy guy X is saying, and last night, I chatted with him for a few minutes (despite what they tell us in Peace Corps training, nonverbal communication doesn’t really help – my arms were folded, I slowly edged away, but nothing stopped him from trying to chat me up).

Anyway, she warned me against him, much like the bathroom wall in White Gravenor has warned hundreds (thousands?) of Georgetown students. It struck me how indirect this method is – passing information after the fact, through informal networks, rather than involve authorities or official capacities. But that’s what makes it effective, and I think necessary – there is no burden of proof, which means it can be abused, but also means that people can share instincts and hearsay. And honestly, I would rather trust someone else’s instincts and hearsay, which confirm my own, than wait for something horrible to happen and have the police confirm it with proper evidentiary procedure. Anyway, sort of a random post, but it really made me think about how networks of women have looked out for each other and found ways outside the formal channels to pass information and try to keep each other safe. I don’t think I’m in any danger from this guy, but it’s good to know to stay away, and I’m glad that woman said something to me.