Friday, September 25, 2009

Bonne Douche

Sometimes, something happens that just begs a blog post. Really, I am compelled to write about what happened to me today: the Most Awkward Peeing Experience Ever (MAPEE, if you will – truly the mother of all awkward peeing experiences). Surely, you say, nothing could be more awkward than the time the fat Italian baristo had to break down the bathroom door to let you out to a crowd of well-dressed Italians having cappuccino and what not. Indeed, my friend, this tops it.

A few things you should know about Beninese culture: 1) The owner of a bar and his family usually live in a house behind the bar 2) Beninese people pee in their showers 3) People are pretty comfortable with nudity and bodily excretions here. So, today I was at a bar, having dinner with my friend. I ask to use the bathroom and the server leads me through a curtain, past a woman and child taking a nap in a bedroom, and to their shower. Pretty normal so far. Except there is a woman showering there. (Perhaps a 4th cultural note: by “shower” I mean bucket bath). I explained that I could wait until the woman was finished. “Nonsense,” said the server. “Just go over there and do it.” (I’m paraphrasing only slightly). So, I sidle past this fully naked and soapy woman (it was not a very wide shower area) and crouch to do my business. Meanwhile, she just hangs out in the shower, waiting for me to be done. I truthfully had to bite my lip to keep from laughing at the absurdity of the moment. I finished, sidled past again, wished her a “bonne douche” (good shower) and was on my way. I appeared to be the only person even slightly surprised by the situation.

I guess I’ll miss these ridiculous moments when I’m done. In the meantime, let this be a lesson to always wear shower shoes when in Benin.